The Secret To Better Conversation Skills

The Secret To Better Conversation Skills
by Peter Murphy

Conversation is an important skill in almost every
situation. Whether it’s on the job, with spouse or
children, in a social setting or everyday life,
conversation is important.

It’s the way we communicate with others and often is then
the way we are seen or perceived by others. Honing your
conversation skills will allow you to feel more at
ease when conversing with others and will help you say what
you really want to convey.

1. Think about your tone, it should be pleasing, not too
loud or too soft.

If you are talking too loudly you might be considered an
unpleasant conversationalist and who will want to talk to
you?

If you are speaking too softly and people have to strain to
hear you, they might get tired of trying to listen.

2. Think about some things you might need or want to say
before you are at that job interview or party.

It will be helpful to think this through and even practice
out loud. You will come across as being confident and
intelligent.

3. Don’t feel you need to dominate a conversation.

Even if you are quite charming it won’t be long before
others are weary of hearing the same voice.

There used to be a rule about conversation in certain
African tribes. When a person rose to speak they were
required to stand on one foot while speaking. As soon as
the other foot touched the ground, their turn was over.
Keep this in mind.

4. How will you handle unpleasant conversations?

What will you do if you are criticized or if someone
disagrees with you? Think of ways to face these
situations before they happen.

If you can remain calm and fairly pleasant during the tough
talks you will improve your conversation skills. You will
also earn a reputation as someone who can easily be talked
to.

5. Think of your last embarrassing conversation.

How did you do? Could there be improvement? If the answer
is "yes" begin by figuring out why the conversation
was embarrassing.

Let’s say someone asked you when you are planning to have
children. Even though this may not be anyone’s business how
do you want to respond?

You do have choices. You can be funny, charming, rude or
elusive. Again, plan ahead for some of these questions and
decide how you want to react.

6. One of the most important parts of communication is
listening. It’s a gift and a skill, one that you can
develop if it doesn’t come easily for you.

There once was a woman who thought she had a hearing
problem, even her friends told her she couldn’t hear.

Often she would ask them to repeat parts of a conversation.
Finally after several months she made an appointment with
an audiologist.

The doctor decided to forego the newest technology and use
his favorite, less techno approach. He held his pocket
watch up and asked the woman if she could hear the ticking.

She could so the doctor got up and walked behind the woman
and asked if she could still hear the watch ticking. She
could with no problem.

The doctor continued this test by moving further and
further away from the woman and each time she could hear
the ticking of the watch. After the doctor finished the
testing he told the woman that her hearing was fine but she
needed some help with her listening. Don’t forget to listen
because it is essential for good conversation skills.

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