Difficult Conversations and How to Turn Them Around

by Peter Murphy

Many of us have run into difficult people. Some people even
like difficult conversations. Arguments are necessary and
are going to happen, but this difficulty shouldn’t stop you
from communicating.

Nobody agrees 100% of the time, so arguing is a natural
part of the conversation. However, some arguments are
unproductive and lead to hard feelings and can even ruin
relationships.

Knowing how to deal with difficult conversations can ensure
that your argument will not turn out too bad.

The following tips will help you to argue more effectively.
You will see how you can learn from an argument and what is
necessary to make sure an argument ends on the right foot.

Tip#1 Communicate effectively.

You should not use yelling and harsh words to get your
point across. Instead speak calmly and be cautious of words
you use. Use sentences that say "I" instead of blaming
sentences that use "You".

You should always be aware that you have a point and try to
explain it while also taking in the other persons point.
Don´t let anyone give you the impression your opinion is
not worth expressing.

Tip#2 Remember the other person.

There are two sides to any argument. You should give the
other person respect and listen to their side. Do not shut
them out.

Do not stray from the topic at hand. Most often people
start bringing up past fights or other things that are
completely unrelated to the current argument. Doing his can
cause the other person to shut down and not even want to
speak to you.

Tip#3 Focus.

You should be really trying to work out the problem. Keep
feelings out of the mix. Do not try to make the other
person feel bad because they disagree with you. Watch their
body language to see if they are tense or starting to feel
relaxed.

Arguments go better when people can relax a little. This
helps them to listen better. Be specific with what you
think and what you want the outcome to be. Avoid using the
phrase "I don’t know".

Tip#4 Resolution.

The ultimate goal with difficult conversations is to
resolve the issue. Try to work out a compromise. Perhaps
someone will have changed their mind by the end. You need
to resolve any negative feelings that may have cropped up
as a result of the argument.

You want everything to return to as it was before the
argument. Nobody should hold any resentment or the argument
was never really resolved.

You do not have to fight to get things done. You can use
these tips in almost any atmosphere where difficult
conversations may crop up.

It doesn’t even matter if the other person is not reacting
this way, as long as you use these tips the other person
should calm down as well. You are not only arguing
effectively, but teaching others by example how to argue
better.

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Your Friend,

Peter Murphy

Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently
revealed the secret strategies all high achievers use to
communicate with charm and impact. The same techniques you
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