Thursday, February 03, 2005

4 Great Ways To Improve Social Skills

by Peter Murphy

Improving your social skills can be a difficult thing to
accomplish but it can be done. Nothing is more
uncomfortable than inadequate social skills.

Below are a few basic steps to take so that improving your
social skills becomes not only a change but a better
lifestyle for you.

Step #1 Start socializing close to home.

Not literally but metaphorically. Start by looking at your
closest social interactions. If you are the kind of person
who is more off to themselves and not very active at your
friends’ parties then you are more than likely the same
person who can’t speak up in a business or find the courage
to initiate a date.

So start by mingling yourself with your closest people more
often. Practice by holding conversation with family you
don’t regularly speak too or becoming more active in the
party scene with your friends.

There’s no need to become outrageous just speak up with
those you fell comfortable with.

Step #2 Improve your conversation skills.

Nervousness is a common occurrence when it comes to
interacting with other people, it doesn’t have to be an
obstacle though.

Watch the conversation and don’t let those uncomfortable
pauses scare you. Remember if you are nervous there is a
good chance that the other person is nervous as well, so
just take it easy.

Try small talk, like the weather or the economy or things
locally that you have in common such as the job or what’s
been on television lately.

When you see the conversation picking back up then just let
it flow naturally and if you need to guide it back to amore
important topic.

Something else to remember in the conversation is to avoid
talking over the other person. Watch the person’s reaction
and if your are really worried about interrupting, try and
anticipate their next move.

Above all, apologizing instead of simply ordering the
person to continue speaking when you interrupt is never
overrated. Being polite is the easiest way to improve your
social skills.

Step #3 Improve the body language in your social skills.

Crossing your arms is subconsciously offensive because you
display a piece of aggression, stating that you would
rather not become deeply engaged in the conversation and
that possibly you might be bored.

If you are seated, crossing your legs displays the same
message. Try and keep your arms down, hands in the pockets
are fine.

Try and keep your legs down and if you are standing don’t
sway. Swaying can suggest again that you are bored or that
you are in a hurry.

Step #4 Ending the Conversation.

Knowing how to end conversation is just as important in
improving your social skills as holding the conversation is.

Holding onto a conversation that is clearly over labels you
as annoying and selfish. Watch the other person’s movements
and actions.

We as humans have very subtle but dependable signs of
letting each know when we are through. If the other person
tends to refer to their "to do list" for the day or are
constantly shifting their body weight or displaying other
physical signs of boredom, let them go.

Improving your social skills can be done. Don’t worry, keep
trying and aim to improve a little each day. Good social
skills are the foundation for success!

Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently
produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to
Developing Communication Confidence. Apply now because
it is available for a limited time only at:

Improving your social skills can be done!


Anonymous said...

that is very good information for shy and low confident people=)

Anonymous said...

This will be a starting poing in my growth to being a confiedent converser.