Thursday, December 16, 2004

How to Start a Conversation Effortlessly

How to Start a Conversation Effortlessly
by Peter Murphy

If you are one of the millions who have difficulty in starting and participating in conversations, you should realize that life's successes and failures are closely related to the quality of your communication skills. The ability to converse effortlessly with those you encounter is a critical component of all your personal and business relationships. Good communication skills promote an image of self-confidence and intelligence. This is not to say that those people who find it hard to strike up a conversation are less intelligent. They simply need to develop the appropriate skills. If you need to improve upon your communication skills, here are a few tips to help you get started down the right path. You can learn how to start a conversation and converse with anybody, anytime.

1. In order to make interesting conversation, you must be interesting to others. Keeping yourself informed on current events, staying involved in activities, and keeping a mental list of good topics of discussion are excellent ways to break the ice and a great tool to help you learn how to start a conversation with almost anybody.

2. Instead of focusing on how uncomfortable you feel, prepare yourself by thinking of the issues that interest you most and what you would like to discuss about a particular subject. A little preparation will go a long way in enabling you to easily converse with others. Don't be afraid to ask questions. In general, people like to talk about themselves and will respond favorably when asked simple, friendly questions. Learning how to start a conversation is not quite as difficult if you prepare in advance.

3. Make an effort to be a good listener when starting a conversation. After you make the initial effort, listen closely to the other person's response. Often you'll find an invitation to continue the conversation if you listen carefully and respond accordingly. Balance is the key in any conversation. Alternate between talking and listening to what the other person is saying and make additional comments as appropriate. Learning how to start a conversation is really just using good manners and showing a genuine interest in others.

4. Even if you find it extremely difficult, always greet those you encounter with a smile and look them directly in the eye. It may be hard at first, but self-confidence is a learned skill and by acting confidently, you will gain new self-confidence. Soon enough you will notice that it is not as hard to maintain eye contact and carry on a conversation. Act confidently and you will eventually become confident. Developing self-confidence is an important part of learning how to start a conversation.

5. Try to remember small details about co-workers and acquaintances. Asking about a weekend plan or a relative is an excellent way to start a conversation and show genuine interest in those around you. If you are interesting, attentive, and act with confidence you will appear to be the kind of person people like to have as a friend. By practicing these new skills until they become second nature, you will increase your own self-esteem and learn how to start a conversation easily.

Learning how to start a conversation is really just a process of practicing your social skills until they become a habit. Repetition and determination are the most important factors in building your level of confidence and conversing effortlessly in any situation.

Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently
revealed the secret strategies all high achievers use to
communicate with charm and impact. The same techniques you
can use to overcome shyness, develop great conversation
skills and build self-confidence.

Click here now to test this simple step-by-step system:

http://www.howtotalkwithconfidence.com





1 comment:

Roger S said...

Hi there Peter,
Good solid advice. The only observation I'd make is that, despite being grown adults and knowing that the earth will not swallow us up, many of us are often reluctant to start conversations because of childhood programming -- being conditioned not to talk to strangers, and not speaking until being spoken to.
The first, is, of course, sound practice when you are a child, unfortunately; the second enables schools to function with a minimum of chaos.
However, these programs do not serve us well as adults. Overcoming them is easier said than done, though.