Thursday, June 16, 2005

How To Get The Respect And Appreciation You Deserve

by Peter Murphy

If you have ever tired to win the respect and approval of
others you know how difficult it can be. Especially when
people are not responsive causing you to feel anxious and
even more nervous.

What typically happens next is that you perform poorly
because you feel tense. You fail to express yourself as
well as you can so others do not see you in the best light.
This of course is not a good recipe for winning respect and

What can you do to create a favorable impression in the
eyes of those you want to impress?

1. Relax when meeting people

This is easier said than done unless you know how to
quickly relax even in difficult situations. The ability to
relax when under pressure is an essential skill that allows
you to be at your best whenever you need to be.

When you feel relaxed you will quickly and easily keep the
conversation flowing, you won´t worry about making mistakes
and you´ll find it easier to think of interesting things to
say. Imagine how good that will feel!

Feeling relaxed enables you to enjoy the moment, to pay
closer attention to whoever you are talking to and to drop
those nagging feelings of self-consciousness.

Instant relaxation is the secret to effortlessly making
conversation on a broad range of topics without worrying
about saying the wrong thing. (more about how to relax in
a moment later in this article)

2. Don´t beg for respect

A common mistake is to be overly nice in the hope of
earning respect. This approach never works. The harder you
try to impress the more desperate you will seem.

The best way to earn respect is to start by respecting
yourself. Positive self-talk, affirmations and
visualization all go a long way towards building a sense of
pervasive self-esteem that others pick up on.

The more you respect yourself, the better other people will
treat you. Why? Because your posture, the way you talk and
you entire presence will change for the better when you
feel better about yourself.

Others merely reflect back how you treat yourself. When you
change your behavior other people respond by changing how
they interact with you.

When you have more self-respect for some strange reason
whoever you talk to will pick up on it and start showing
you more respect.

3. Respect and appreciate the other person

The more you choose to like and appreciate the person you
are talking to the more that person will warm to you. When
you exude interest, when you really listen to the other
person and especially when you compliment that person you
encourage a favorable response in them.

People feel obligated to return good treatment with more of
the same. You will notice more compliments, genuine
interest in you and even delight when you give of these
qualities first. So remember to give what you want to get!

Doing so can feel awkward and uncomfortable at first if you
are used to letting others do most of the talking. You need
to get used to speaking up and even leading the
conversation if you are to create an environment of mutual
respect and appreciation.

This is a very important distinction - if you do not make
this change in how you deal with people you will never be
more than a relatively passive observer of the
conversations unfolding before you.

How can you make this change quickly and easily? click here
now to discover my step-by-step system....

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